Doctor No

I've read that during the first year it is important to expose your child to as much language as possible to help form neural connections. There's apparently a direct correlation between the number of words a child hears in their first year and their intelligence later in life. Sadly, this research doesn't seem to take into account the fact that every second word you say from the time your child begins to crawl is NO.

No - don't do that.
No - don't touch that.
No - don't go there.
No - that's not even remotely edible.
No - cats don't enjoy having their tails pulled.
No - that will electrocute you if you chew on it.
No - throwing yourself head first off the couch probably won't end well.

I think I'm going to have to start just sticking random five dollar words into all the No's I'm having to say so my child doesn't end up with a one word vocabulary and an IQ of 4. For example, I could try saying things like: No, my adorable progeny, that's not yours. Don't be so megalomaniacal. (This isn't yours. Not everything is yours.) OR Beloved! No more obstreperous screeching. Please strive to be more unobtrusive. (Quiet, kiddo. Mommy can't hear out of her left ear anymore thanks to you) No, what you're trying to do is quixotically temerarious. (What you're trying to do is suicidal. Please reconsider.)

Too much??